When Stress, Worrying, and Too Much Thinking Becomes Overwhelming

INTRODUCTION

This Hub was written in response to a HubPages forum post about how to stop (as the poster described it) "obsessive" thinking, over-analyzing, worrying, etc. without medication.  What was not clear at the time I wrote this Hub was whether the individual intended to use the word "obsessive" as defined in the field of Psychiatric, or whether he was using in the way many people in the general population may use it (which often amounts, essentially, to hyperbole).

I've written this Hub based on the assumption that he didn't necessarily mean "obsessive, as it is used by professionals in the fields of Psychiatry and Psychology), and instead assumed the poster was using the term in a more casual way.  He did, however, mention medication in his thread; so that led me to wonder if this individual was being less casual in his use of the word, "obsessive", than I had assumed.

It's important to note that it isn't suggested this Hub will help someone who would be diagnosed by mental-health professionals as having "obsessive" thinking.  It's aimed, instead, at people without such a disorder and, instead, with nothing more than the kind of worries, stress, and over-thinking that can plague most people at one time or another.  The link to the actual forum thread is here:

(http://hubpages.com/forum/topic/49388)

...but here's what I came up with as far as answering that forum question goes:

Are you sure it's "technically" obsessive thinking, or do you just mean you get yourself all stewed up thinking about everything (the way a lot of people do )?

The way I see it, thinking a lot usually means having a lot to think about it. It's Nature's way of making us use what we have to solve problems. :lol:

On a more serious note:

I don't think people should necessarily try to "control" or stop "over-thinking". I think, maybe, people should instead sort out their thoughts, decide what problems can be solved by thinking about them, which ones won't be solved (even by all the thinking in the world) at the moment, making to-do lists, prioritize, and do all those kinds of things that help a person sort out "a big mess of thoughts" into something more manageable and less likely to cause additional "wheel-spinning". Stress and anxiety, themselves, cause chemical changes that make thinking clearly less possible; and they also can make a person feel so uncertain that the need to keep thinking gets worse.

Worries

That's why asking which worries are things that can be "addressed" right now, which are about things that can't be addressed until a later time, and which ones you can't do anything about makes a big difference. Put the "can't do anything about this" worries in a "mental file" at the back of your mind.

There are those worries about which we can do nothing. That's sometimes when it can help to tell yourself that most of the time these things work out OK and let yourself assume it will. If it doesn't, you'll deal with that when it happens. There are no prizes for being "so smart" we correctly guess which awful things will happen when the potential of it seems to be there as a result of a worrisome situation. Some people seem to think they need to prepare themselves for "the worst". The fact is, we can never truly be prepared for "the worst", and a good part of the time what "worst" happens is something we never would have imagined. On the other hand, there are times when worries about "the worst" are legitimate because there is a high potential that"the worst" will happen. Even then, sometimes the only way to deal with that is to assume things will be OK and know you'll find some way to deal with "the worst" if/when it actually does happen.

"To Do" Lists

"To Do" lists aren't just for things like getting your car's oil changed or dropping off clothes at the cleaners. The good thing about "To Do" lists is that they get some things out of your head and onto paper, where you can see them in a nice, neat, list. When you feel like you have too many thoughts and worries going on, ask if there's some "To Do" list you can write for it. For example, if bills are your worries, maybe you can't pay them but you can write a list about which one's you'll pay first, how much you'll pay, etc. Make lists about things like house chores, personal tasks, health, the kids' appointments, car maintenance, holidays - whatever issues you have on your mind, for which a "To Do" list (or several of them) might help clear a few things out.

Stress

A lot of stress (most of it, a good part of the time) is caused by worries and having a lot to do. Some, of course, is caused by either the roots of the worries and work, themselves, or else by something unrelated to either worry or too much work.

So, for causes of stress that don't fall under any of the categories above, ask if it's one of the following three:

Caused by a major living/life situation

Caused by a minor living/life situation

Caused by exhaustion (which is either caused by your lifestyle in general, caused by not getting enough sleep, or cause by the the stress).

If your stress is caused by a major living/life situation there's a chance you can't change it (but if you can, of course, you should). Sort outo what you need or what you need to do in order to take steps toward changing your situation, or at least make small improvements in it. If there's nothing you can change about your situation (and these situations are more common than a lot of people who realize they are) ask yourself what things you can do to making living within that situation a little easier. Make those "To Do" lists to help you see those things on paper.

Note: When I used the word "paper" for your "To Do" lists I was tempted to add, "or computer monitor", but I think that psychologically, paper does something that a computer screen doesn't do for some people. There's something about being able to have those lists in your hand, organize the lists, put them in a personal, little, notebook or a nice, big, stable-seeming (and "all encompassing" binder) and actually seeing some of those thoughts as something tangible and something to which you can go back and refer, or change, the next time you start over-thinking again.

If your stress is caused by minor things in life, change those things or eliminate them if possible. Again, use the "To Do" lists to help you get on paper whatever steps you need to take, and in what order, to change those minor, but stressful, situations.

If you have to, either before or instead of a "To Do" list, make lists of things that are bothering you (major and minor situations/things) in order to create a "basic framework" from which to do any further thought-sorting.

If you're stress is caused (either solely or as well as) by not getting enough sleep, find a way to get some sleep before you do anything else.

Whether it's long term, short-term, or both; stress contributes to inability to concentrate when the body in is a stress-response mode. Good coping skills can help keep a person from going into quite as extreme a stress-response as someone else may have under similar circumstances. It almost doesn't matter, though, how easily a person goes into a stress-response mode. What matters is that while he's in it, the individual is likely not to be able to think as clearly as he otherwise would. What also matters is that the stress-response mode is not a healthy one for the body.

Nature has designed people so that under stress (interpreted as "threat" by the body and evolutionary hard-wiring) arteries constrict (to prevent bleeding to death under real physical threat). Blood glucose levels rise, as does Cortisol (the stress hormone).

Doctors involved in a study related to stress and food cravings actually recommended that people give in to the cravings for high-energy foods (foods high in calories or fat) as a way of getting the body out of that unhealthy stress-response mode in the short term. It was noted, of course, that weight gain and other health problems would result if a person uses food to get his body out of the stress-response mode on a regular basis. Still, it was suggested that even a small, short-term, weight gain is healthier than remaining in a high-stress mode.

This leads to less-than-perfect solution to the problem of having difficulty concentrating and thinking clearly under too much stress - eating something that returns the body to a normal state. It's not an ideal solution, and the doctors who recommended it also noted that a better way may be to use other techniques for reducing stress.

The point is, while we can't always eliminate the causes of stress, we can usually find ways to at least get the body out of the high-stress mode that over-thinking can aggravate; so the first step in getting control of that "over-thinking state" might be to reduce or eliminate that stress-response state that actually makes thinking and solving (or at least sorting out) problems more difficult than they would otherwise be.

The right music can reduce stress. So can fresh air. Exercise can help if a person isn't so exhausted by long-term stress that his body no longer produces what he needs to be able to cope with, and function under, new demands (like exercise) on the body. The benefit of laughing shouldn't be overlooked. Laughing changes brain chemicals and can help reduce stress and get a person out of a "cycle of anxiety" that can be caused when "wheel-spinning" takes place for too long.


A Mental Trick

If at all possible, the first place to start in regaining control of your thinking is to "mentally step back" and tell yourself, "Just stop thinking about this until at least x-o'clock." If you can give yourself an hour (or five hours) of "thinking-is-off-limits" time it can be enough to give your mind and body a chance to take a little break for awhile, be a little renewed, and be a little more ready to start doing some of those other things that may help clear your head on a longer-term basis.

Apparently, what works for some people is to "get their mind off" their stress and worries by thinking of something else. If that works, great. What I've found, however, is that if the stress and worries get to be too much (and often for too long) they can be so "energy-draining" a person loses interest and energy to the point where the last thing that helps is trying to "be busy" with some "mindless" activity. Some people may garden, cook, crochet, or even clean as a way of having something else to thinking about. What I've found is if I'm going to go the "mindless activity" route it REALLY needs to mindless. Absurd as this will seem, something I found that helped as a "mindless activity" was creating cartoon dolls on the Internet (the kind kids often create by starting with a drawing as a body, to which hair-do's and clothes can be added to create different characters). (I've got a "fine library" of princess cartoon dolls from a site aimed at, as far as I can tell, little girls of about nine years old. Hey - it did the job at the time.)

Another Mental Trick

Another way to kind of force your mind into thinking more positive thoughts is to look around and notice a few things you have that somehow makes you feel good when you think about it, or look at it. It could be something absolutely minor, like a tea-kettle that just makes you happy when you see it, a shelf of books you love, a cute little TV that yours, a room you particularly love - anything at all. Focus on one of those things that just kind of makes you feel good, and think about why you like it, why you got it, how it makes you feel - really analyze the reasons this object kind of makes you feel a little happier. Believe it or not, doing this may actually lead you to learning some new thing about yourself, what makes you happy, or what you need in life. Also, it can help remind you of the "core you" (as opposed to the "stressed-out you"), and that, by itself, can help you find a little more grounding.


No One Answer

The truth is, there's usually not one, simple, answer to the question about clearing one's mind and stopping "over-thinking". Besides all the things mentioned above, one simple thing that can help just a little might be to think of all the people and things in your life for which you're very grateful. We never really think about who, or what about our lives (like good health), we deeply appreciate. This is another way to re-focus thinking and move it (at least for awhile) away from the negative and destructive thoughts to more positive and meaningful thoughts. This kind of thinking is a soul-nurturing kind of thinking, and soul-nurturing is one thing that can help us "build back up a little more mental energy" and feel a little more calm as we once again begin addressing the nitty-gritty matters of life.