What I'd Tell A Grade-School Child Who is Afraid of a Hurricane On the Way

The HubPages "Answers" section had a question about opinions on how to help an eight-year-old child who is afraid of the the hurricane headed for his area. The following thoughts are my own ideas on how I'd handle this particular problem:

An eight-year-old child is old enough to have a pretty good idea of the some of the potential danger a hurricane can bring, but a child of that age usually isn't mature enough to be able to find a way to put some things in perspective for himself. If you think of how young he is, he doesn't have much experience from which to build any perspective. Also, even though he's well beyond being a baby, toddler, or preschooler; a child this age is still a very young child and can still feel pretty helpless under a lot of circumstances. Children old enough to understand that storms can be dangerous are generally old enough to also imagine all kinds of terrible things happening, often imagining things a lot worse than they often usually turn out to be.

First, I'd limit his exposure to news and weather forecasts. I'd encourage him to go play where nobody was watching the TV coverage, and I'd turn the sound down low enough that he wouldn't hear it from the other room. I wouldn't announce why the TV volume was low, for example; but I'd find ways to encourage him to be busy (without mentioning that I was trying to encourage him to get his mind off). He's old enough to have a pretty good idea of the kind of potential danger, but he's not old enough to have found a way to put it all in perspective. If he asked why the volume was low, I'd tell him something like, "We're watching the coverage, and if we see something that looks like we should turn the sound up we will. Other than that, there's no real need to have the sound up all that high."

In other words, I'd aim for letting him see that I was paying attention and concerned, but that I was also calm and fairly confident.

With my kids, I always pointed out to them how many old houses and trees had remained intact through decades (or hundreds of years) of all kinds of storms. I also pointed out that being prepared for a storm, and taking steps to minimize potential problems helps a person feel a little less worried about it. I wouldn't lie and say I guaranteed that everything would be fine, but I'd point out that "just about most of the time" people are fine. Sometimes there's some damage outside. Sometimes there's not much. (I, personally, lived through a hurricane that came through my area; and the only thing that was damaged was a piece of my fence fell down.

I'd point out to him that sometimes that kind of minimal damage can happen, and maybe more often than bigger damage. I'd tell him that if there was damage outside (to street signs, trees, etc)., people need to clean it up; but it's not always a major problem.

If there are things about your area that make some types of damage less likely (even unlikely), pointing out those things and why some types of damage (or danger) aren't very likely might help (while also making sense to him and therefore helping him see that what you're telling him is accurate, rather than "empty reassurance"). If you live where there's little concern about nearby bodies of water (or if you on high ground), point out that flooding wasn't likely. Point out that people are prepared to deal with any flooding, and that most flooding isn't what kids sometimes imagine. I'd tell him that he has parents who are paying attention to what authorities are telling people they can do to keep safe. If flooding may be a problem make sure he knows that some flooding is street flooding, which means cars can't pass by on the street but which doesn't mean the water, for example, comes up to the second floor of a house. If you don't live near the coast, point out that that being farther inland can mean the storm won't hit our area as hard. If you live near the coast, point how many other people have had homes along the coast for years. If there's a real risk of more serious flooding than flooded streets, tell him you have a plan in place; and so do the authorities; and "in the unlikely event that happens" you'll take the necessary action based on the different set of circumstances at the time.

When my sister and I were kids and a hurricane came, my parents told us to just play in our bedroom together where it was safe. I recall feeling a little nervous when I saw the branches brushing against the windows, but I knew enough not to think about it and to try to keep my mind on what we were doing. I think I'd tell him the same kind of technique. I think I'd point out to him that the storm was likely to last x amount of hours, and that, as with all rainstorms, there would be lots of rain and things like leaves or small sticks blowing around outside (even if the hurricane were a less powerful one than some). So, I'd tell him it might help if he just tried to ignore the rain the wind "because often it's not a whole lot different than any other big storm".

I did something similar when my own kids were little - only I had a different area where they were away from windows. I told them it was the safest place in the house, that they should play, and that their father and I were keeping an eye out to make sure they would be safe. I'd emphasize that even though they'd heard of terrible storms, the vast majority of storms are not as destructive as that. I'd tell my own kids how most hurricanes lose steam as they travel over land (which is how it is in my area).

If he brought up the issue of something like Hurricane Katrina, I think I'd tell him that that storm was one of the biggest that's ever occurred; that people weren't as prepared as they needed to be; and that a lot has been learned from that storm that has helped people know better now how to prepare and take hurricane warnings seriously. If he doesn't know about Katrina and hasn't heard about it, I don't think (needless to say, perhaps) that this is the time to let him hear about it.

I'd tell him, too, that one reason children are often more afraid than adults are is that children haven't lived long enough to really see that people get through hurricanes all the time without major problems; and also that because children haven't lived through many of them, they sometimes imagine them to be worse than they turn out to be.

I'd try to keep the mood upbeat in the house and create the impression that I was fairly confident that all would be well. I'd point out how many storms people over a certain age have gotten through just fine. I'd remind them with modern forecasting, a whole lot of problems can be eliminated by knowing what steps to take to keep safe. Also, I'd let him know if the forecast for the day after the storm was for calm weather.